Sisterly Love
by MadTwilighter
Summary: Rosalie's easy to annoy. It's easy when you have an extreme talent for being annoying and can see the future.  It's especially easily when your name is Alice Cullen.
1. Chapter 1

Rosalie's easy to annoy. It's easy when you have an extreme talent for being annoying and can see the future. It's especially easily when your name is Alice Cullen.

**This is only my second fan-fic ever! Please read and enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: As much as I wish I never had and never will own Twilight or any of the characters. All rights belong to the wonderful Stephenie Meyer.**

**CHAPTER 1: Lalala I can't hear you.**

"Lalala! I can't hear you." I put my hands over my ears and raced to my room before Rosalie could catch me. I slammed and locked the door and collapsed giggling on my bed. Rosalie was so funny when she was angry.

"ALICE CULLEN! If you don't come out here right now…"

"Lalala! I can't hear you!" I cut over Rosalie's voice and tuned out while she tried to bust down my door. I'm so glad that I had that reinforced steel door put in. it wouldn't keep her out forever but it would hold her for a while.

"ALICE CULLEN! IF YOU DON'T COME OUT…"

"LALA…la…"

I trailed off. Oops. It wasn't Rosalie. It was Esme. I quickly ran outside and faced Esme and Rosalie.

"Alice Cullen present and accounted for."

"Alice. What did you do this time?" Esme asked sternly.

"Me? I didn't do anything."

"What did you do to Rosalie? And if you don't tell me she will and you'll be grounded. That'll mean no shopping trip this weekend."

Rosalie poked her tongue out at me from behind Esme's back. That bitch! She was blackmailing me.

"Well…" I twirled a longish piece of my hair round my finger.

"Cut the cute crap Alice. Get to the point."

"Ok ok. I kind of 'borrowed' that blue jumper she wears all the time and when I washed it for her I 'forgot' that it was wool and it kind of shrunk in the washer."

"Did you ask to borrow the jumper?" Esme asked me.

"Well…" this was the question I didn't want her to ask.

"No mum. She didn't. And it was my favourite jumper." Rosalie's words cut over me.

"Alice is this right?"

"Yes mum" I replied meekly.

"Ok both of you are grounded for a week."

"What the FUCK!" Rosalie screeched.

"Yes Rosalie. Your behaviour before was unacceptable. And the use of that language was too. You know your father and I don't approve as such words. Consider yourself lucky I don't give you two weeks."

I smirked. Punishment was so much sweeter when Rosalie's involved.

**So how did I go! Please review and tell me! The more reviews that I get will determine the amount of chapters I write. Bad reviews are also good because it helps me to improve what I'm writing.**


	2. Chapter 2

**So how was my first chapter? Please review more. It helps me to write more. If you want more.**

**Disclaimer: As usual, as much as I wish I don't own Twilight ****(or Sailor Moon)**

**Chapter 2: Permanent makeovers**

I sauntered into the kitchen. "Hi Rosalie." I smirked as she glowered at me. She still hadn't gotten over the fact that I had gotten her grounded.

"Alice." She gritted her teeth as she smiled at me and then muttered something unpleasant so low that even I couldn't hear it. I laughed openly. Esme told her she was on probation and that she had to be nice to me or else. I however, had served my punishment, and then gotten off scotts free. It's just too easy to be nice.

Rosalie glared at me and then stalked off.

I sat down in the lounge room and started thinking. It was about time to play another prank on Rosalie. I searched into her future to find something she was going to do that I could sabotage. Finally I hit the goldmine. She and Emmett were going to draw funny pictures and words all over each other with Rosalie's eyeliner. All I had to do was switch the ink inside her liquid eyeliner to permanent ink and I would be seeing plenty of moustaches for a while.

I scoured the future for the best time to do it and I saw her going to the shops for a few hours. That would be when i would make my move.

Quickly and stealthily, I sneaked into Rosalie's room and poured her liquid eyeliner down the sink. I pulled out my container of permanent ink and filled up her eyeliner to the exact same level, then made my way out of her room and into mine.

I decided to watch for her future so I could see the fun unravelling. Yuk, Yuk, Yuk. I didn't see the undressing part. Finally it got to the good part. Rosalie now had a moustache, a monobrow and a big penis on her forehead. I convulsed in laughter and then searched for Emmett. He had I love head written across his forehead in bubble letters. Emmett also had various body parts, love hearts and sexy messages written over his body. I convulsed in laughter again.

I then saw Rosalie's face when she couldn't get the writing off. It was priceless. Then she kicked down my door and had me in a headlock.

"Alice Cullen what did you do!" Rosalie screeched at me. Emmett then plodded down the hall wearing a balaclava.

"Emmett! Help!" I screamed out. Rosalie looked like she was about to rip my head off.

"OK!" he shrugged and then went and put his hand around Rosalie's waist.

"Oh no." I sobbed. "I meant help me not he-he-her. HEEEELLLLLPPPPPPPP!" I screamed out, hoping someone would hear me. In a whirlwind Edward and Jasper were up the stairs and in the room and had removed Rosalie's grip off me. Edward tried to keep a straight face but Jasper started laughing. He had caught sight of Rosalie's face.

"Alright what is going on here?" Esme was standing in between me and Rosalie.

"She" Rosalie pointed at me, "changed my liquid eyeliner to permanent ink!" Rosalie lunged at me but was blocked by Esme.

"And what proof do you have of this?" Esme trailed off and started laughing as she saw Rosalie's face. "Why do you have explicit drawings all over your face?" Esme asked.

"Well," Rosalie looked embarrassed," Emmett and I…"

"Alright! I don't want to know." Esme put her hands up in the air. "Alice did you do this?"

"Of course not mother!" I acted shocked.

"Are you sure?" she questioned suspiciously.

"Of course!" I was so glad that I couldn't blush. But I didn't know is Esme bought it.

"Edward?" she asked. I knew that she wanted him to read my mind to see if I did it. So I decided to make my own version of the Sailor Moon Theme Song.

Edward nodded. I began my singing.

"_Playing baseball by moonlight,_

_Keeping out of the daylight_

_Never running from a real fight_

_She is the one named Sailor Alice_

_She might turn her back on her friends_

_But she's always there to defend._

_She is the one on whom we can depend_

_She is the one named Sailor…_

_Sailor Edward!_

_Sailor Rosalie!_

_Sailor Jasper!_

_Sailor Emmett!_

_She has the power to see the future_

_She is the one named Sailor Alice!_

_Playing baseball by moonlight_

_Keeping out of the daylight_

_She doesn't need help to fight._

_She is the one named Sailor Alice!_

_She is the one named Sailor Alice!_

_She is the one Sailor Alice!_

"Well Edward? What do you think?" Esme asked Edward. I prayed that he would side with me but my hopes weren't very high.

"I don't know Esme. She's making a spoof of the Sailor Moon Theme song and putting all our names in it, so I would assume that she's hiding something." Grrr. Why couldn't Edward be on my side for once?

"Jaz," I whispered. "Make Edward feel guilty." Jasper nodded and then I saw Edward squirming.

"Ok Alice. I'm not going to take the sweet road I'm just going to get to it. You know what I said would happen if you didn't behave last time?"

"No mum! You can't do that!" I wailed. "You can't ban me from my closet!"

"One week." I knew that was final and that was it. "And Rosalie, please go and remove that foul crap off your skin somehow. And Emmett, can you please remove that balaclava. It makes you look like a thug."

"Ok mum. If you really want me to."

Emmett removed his balaclava revealing the 'I love head' comment scrawled on his forehead. Everybody dissolved into laughs except for Esme, who inhaled sharply and gasped.

"You knew didn't you Alice?" Her voice was clear from any emotion.

"Yes Mother." I didn't have anywhere to go from here and the future wasn't looking good.

"Better make it two weeks then." How could she do that! Two weeks away from my closet!

My life was officially over.

**How did I go? Review make me write faster!**


	3. Chapter 3

**This is my 3****rd**** chapter! I can't believe how good I'm doing! Please remember to review!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight **

**Chapter 3: Empty Space**

My two weeks was being hell. I tried to be good and did everything Esme asked me but she still showed no signs of budging. It was soooooooooooooooo gay! I even had to wear the same outfit twice! But I knew that Rosalie still hadn't gotten her revenge.

"Hi Alice," Rosalie said fake sweetly and smiled at me. I refrained from growling and lunging at her. I didn't want to lengthen my punishment. I could tell that she was planning something but I couldn't see what she doing. That bitch was playing with the holes in my vision. Whatever she did, it would be a last minute decision. I decided to go talk to Edward.

"Hey Eddy!" I sauntered in to his room.

"What do you want Alice?" Edward asked. He really knew me.

"Well," I started, "I kinda want your help. Rosalie's planning revenge on me but the bitch is playing with the holes in my vision so I can't see what she's planning. Would you be able to side with me and read her mind constantly so you can tell me what she's going to do?" I batted my eyelashes and smiled meekly up at him.

"Alice," Edward complained. "Why are you asking me this? You know Esme told me not to help you do anything to do with Rosalie."

"Don't you love me Edward?" I started to sob knowing this got him every time. "Would you be happy if Rosalie dismembered me? Who would you call your annoying little pixie? Who would you play a fair game of chess with?"

"Alice. Don't pull that one on me. No." Edward whined.

"Please?" Edward shook his head. "Pretty please? Besides you owe me one for not protecting me from Esme's grounding wrath." I then saw he was going to say yes but I refrained from letting that show.

"Okay. I'll help. I'll tell you if she thinks of anything about revenge."

"Yay! Thanks Edward! You're my favourite brother." I gave him a big hug and skipped off.

I sat down in front of the T.V. and turned it on. I flicked through the channels but nothing was on. I decided to leave it on a re-run of Talking about Your Generation. At least it was a bit funny. I was flicking through my future when I saw a vision of Esme coming up to me and telling me I was un-grounded. I was ecstatic.

"Hey Alice," Esme came and sat next to me on the couch. "You've been really good lately and I've not heard a peep of complaint out of you. I think you can be un-grounded."

"Really?" I asked already knowing she meant it. "Thanks mum! I love you!"

Before she could say another word I raced up to my bedroom and flung open the doors to my wardrobe. The next thing I knew was that I was staring at the ceiling. My wardrobe was completely empty! I knew now why I couldn't see her planning something. It was because she was had already done it! Rosa was going to be so dead when I had finished with her. I wasn't going to tell Esme. I had another plan to make THE best prank ever. I was going to call Jacob.


	4. Chapter 4

**How were my last chapters? I think I'm going alright. Make sure to read my other fan fiction- All You need is Vitamin D!**

**Disclaimer: Why can't I own Twilight? I never had and I never will!**

**Chapter 4: Facebook is not a place for secrets **

_Previously in Sisterly Love_

I was going to do something I had never done before. I was going to call Jacob!

Jacob picked up on the first ring.

"Hi," I said nervously, "it's Alice."  
"Alright Bloodsucker. What do you want?" Jacob said gruffly. Wow he got to the point fast, I thought to myself.

"I need a favour."

"No." his answer seemed definite but I kept trying.

"I think you would like it. I need your help to pull an epic prank on Rosalie"

"That blonde bloodsucker?" he asked seeming genuinely interested.

"Yes the blonde one. Her name's Rosalie."

"Alright! You're on! What are we doing?"

"Um, that's what I need your help with." I really had no clue this time of what to do.

"Jacob Black here at your service!" "Darn!" I heard him say in the background. "I can't believe I just said that to a stupid leech!"  
"I can still here you!" I called out through the phone.

"Sorry." Jacob said sheepishly.

Our conversation continued for a while but we still hadn't come up with a good plan. I decided to think about it over night and call him back in the morning.

I grabbed a book off the bookshelf and pretended to read it. As I started to scour Rosalie's future I saw her writing in her diary, and then store it away in the draw of her make-up cabinet. The book was titled _'How to achieve that perfect look'_. Then I had a perfect idea. I was going to steal Rosalie's diary.

The next morning I called Jacob back.

"Hey!" he answered. "I have the perfect idea. When she's asleep we shave all her hair off!"

"Um Jake," I said with caution. "There are two things wrong with that idea. One we don't sleep."

"Oh right," Jacob said disheartened.

"And two, I have a better idea!"

"What is it then?" he asked.

"I know exactly where her diary is. And I know that some of the stuff in it is definitely not G-Rated."

"More like R-Rated?" he asked jokingly.

"Exactly. But I don't know what to do with it though. Maybe I could post it on the web or something?"

"Does she have Facebook?" Jacob asked? "Coz if she does, you could hack her site, and then post it all on there."

"Brilliant!" I exclaimed! "But I'll edit the parts where she writes about being a vampire." This was going to be the best prank ever!

Later that night I crept into Rosalie's bedroom. She and Emmett were on a week long vacation. She wouldn't notice it was gone. I opened her make-up counter's draw and there it was. Rosalie really needed to find some more hiding places. As I flicked through it I nearly vomited. There were naked pictures of Emmett and her in her diary! Rosalie really was going to hate me after this.

I pulled out my laptop and opened up the Facebook site. Her profile wasn't hard to hack. Username: Password: iam-BEAUTIFUL! Rosalie must be the shallowest person I know.

Once I had logged on I started typing. I won't kill you with the specifics but I was wrong about the R-Rating. It was more like the biggest porno of all time! This would get like a Z-Rating or something. I shuddered and clicked enter. Then I sent a text to Jacob saying it was all on the net. Then he sent one back saying 'I never knew Rosalie was porn star. I hate her but do you think she would star at my 18th?"

'Hell yeah' I though. Rosalie ain't gonna like this one bit.

**What is Rosalie gonna do? Keep reading to find out… **


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey! As usual I don't. Own. Twilight. Thankyou**

**Chapter 5- Rosalie's a bitch (and a porn star)**

I sat, scared as a duck waiting for Rosalie to come home. I knew that she knew, because I had seen the messages that people had sent her on Facebook. And directly to her mobile. It was stuff like 'Can I star in your next porno?' and 'I'm cheap!' oh yes. If I wasn't already dead I would be afraid that she would kill me. I heard her pull up and slam the door.

"ALICE CULLEN! I AM GOING TO KILL YOU!"

Everyone else in the house raced downstairs just as Rosalie came in the front door.

"Alice! Come here you little fucker!" Rosalie snarled threateningly.

"Hey! Wait up a second! What happened here?" Esme stepped between us before we killed each other.

"That fucking lying bitch posted my entire diary on Facebook. It was very personal." She added a little embarrassed.

"She means X-Rated." I added with a giggle. Rosalie snarled again.

"Fuck you!" she said spitting in my face and stamping on my foot.

"Did you do that Alice?" Esme asked.

"Yes, but Jacob helped too! I only did it because she took all my clothes out of my closet!" I blurted out without thinking. Crap! I was going to keep the Jacob part a secret.

"Rosalie!" Esme scolded, disgusted. "What did I say about being nice to each other?"

"I don't care what you said! Alice. You are a lying bitch. You're and annoying little brat who should just go and jump off a cliff or something. I hate you and you really don't belong in this family. Everybody hates you, especially me you fucking cow!" Rosalie screamed at me. Esme gasped, looking shell-shocked.

With that Rosalie bitch-slapped me across the face and as I fell to the ground she left the room.

"We will definitely be having words with her," Carlisle murmured to Esme.

We all sat in silence for a few minutes, recovering from Rosalie's outburst. I started crying. Maybe I had taken it too far I thought to myself. Then Jasper saw me crying and came over to me.

"Hey baby," Jasper said softly, picking me up and washing a wave of calmness over me as he carried me to our room with vampire speed.

"What's up? You know Rosalie didn't mean those things." He sent another wave of calmness over me.

"I think she did." I said sadly as I started crying again. "I took it way too far this time."

"I know" he replied taking my small hand in his large one.

"I think it's time I became more mature and stopped all this silly pranking."

"Yeah." Jasper said sitting down and placing me on his lap.

As he kissed me he sent a wave of passion and love over me and our kissing became more passionate.

"Hey!" Jasper said. "I've got an idea. Since you've decided to become more mature we should do something more mature people do." He raised his eyebrows and winked at me.

I quickly looked into the future and saw what he meant. I giggled as I said, "we should definitely do that."

As he pulled me down on the bed I thought to my self. 'If this is what I'm gonna get for being mature I'm never gonna prank Rosalie again. I'll just show her some sisterly love.'

**Okay! That's the end of my fanfiction. But if you guys want more I can probably change that…**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey! I haven't posted on this fanfiction for a while- I've been working on When Vampires Get Bored… I've had an idea, and people are asking me to write more, so I decided to do another chapter.**

**Disclaimer: All rights belong to Stephenie Meyer. I am just making her characters be mean and nasty to each other. (Aren't I nice?) **

**Chapter 6: One Size Too Small**

I lay blissfully on the bed, just soaking in the happy atmosphere Jasper had left behind. I spaced out, and it was hours until a sharp, agitated knock on the door brought me back to reality.

"Come in!" I called out to Rosalie, who I knew was standing at my door, waiting to come in.

"What do you want?" I asked sharply. She was already ruining my mood.

"Don't be cranky Alice. I've come to say sorry. Well actually, Esme made me come and say sorry. All those things I said to you weren't true, except the part where I said you were a little annoying."

"I know I can be annoying. Edward says it's one of my specialties." I was glad Rosalie was being nice to me so I decided to be nice back. "I accept your apology and I have already hacked into your Facebook again and deleted all the stuff off your profile."

"Thanks Alice. You know, you might not be so bad. I put all your clothes back in your closet."

"Oh boy!" I was suddenly excited. "Thanks Rosalie! You know, I think I might actually love you!" I jumped up and gave her the biggest bear hug I was physically able of.

"But before you go in your closet, Esme's called a family meeting downstairs."

We walked down the stairs together, smiling in a very non-fake way. The rest of the family were sitting around the dining room table.

"My you two look happy." Esme exclaimed. "Did you girls make up?"

"Yes!" I chirped. "Rosalie said sorry and I accepted, and then she put the clothes back in my closet and I deleted the stuff off Facebook!" Esme smiled and looked pleased.

"I'm glad you girls have made up. Now, if I ever hear of you girls pranking again, you are going to be in serious trouble."

"Yes mother." We both nodded.

"You are both free to go, but BE WARNED!" I knew that I wasn't going to cross Esme again, but I still wasn't sure how truthful Rosalie was being. She could pull off fake nice like a puppy pulls off cute.

I raced up to my closet. Closing my eyes, I snapped the padlock on the door open easily and opened the doors to their full extent to just bathe in the awesomeness of the clothes. The moment I opened the door, I could tell something was different. It wasn't just the sloppy putting back in job Rose had done, but the smell. The clothes smelled of laundry powder. And I didn't wash my clothes. I just discarded them. Well, except for my favourite jeans and coat.

I walked over to the first rack of clothes and slid them out. They had definitely been washed. Grrr Rosalie! She was trying to get back at me. As I slid a blouse off the hanger I noticed something else. I looked smaller. I held it up against my body. It was one size too small. I checked with the other things in my closet. Everything was one size too small. Rosalie had gotten her revenge on me. I didn't care what Esme said anymore. Rosalie was going to pay. Dearly.

Under my breath is muttered. "This. Is. War!"

Rosalie was so dead.

**Okay. I've written another chappy and I will probably write more now I've gotten back in the swing of it. But now I've got to go and do my maths homework or my maths teacher will be grumpy. Does anybody want to do quadratic equations for me? Keep reading and reviewing!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Sorry sorry sorry! I haven't updated this for so long because I've been writing my other stories; When Vampires Get Bored and All You Need Is Vitamin D! Don't bite me! (Unless you're a vampire) and please read and review.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. **** Or Charlie the Unicorn.**

**Chapter 7: Emmett and his stickers**

I walked out of my closet and started pacing around my room. I can't believe that I trusted that fucking cow Rosalie Hale to be mature enough to stop pranking me. I don't know what to do for revenge though. Jake's fresh out of idea's, Bella doesn't want to get involved, neither do the parentals, and Emmett and Jasper are on Rosalie's side. That only left me one option.

"NESSIE!"

"Yes Aunty Alice?" Renesmee had zoomed up the stairs and was standing in my room.

"I need your help. Come in." Nessie came in and sat down cross legged on my bed.

"What can I help you with?" Nessie asked.

"I need your help to play a prank on Aunt Rose because she put all my clothes in the wash and shrunk them." Renesmee gasped.

"All of them?" Her eyes widened.

"Yes. You can have whatever you want from there because it doesn't fit me anymore."

"Okay Aunty Alice. Thanks!" Nessie smiled. "What do you want me to do?"

"You have to help me think of what to do. But if Grandma and Grandpa Cullen find out, I'll be in big trouble."

"Okay! We'll be secret ninja monkeys and they won't know anything. We gotta be sneaky. We gotta be sneaky Alice!" Nessie used her Charlie the unicorn voice. She had been obsessed with Charlie the unicorn for about a week and it was very funny to see her going around the house being a high-pitched unicorn.

We sat thinking for a while, and Nessie playing in my clothes, until a smile spread across her face.

"Aunty Alice?"

"Yes Nessie. Did you think of something?"

"Yeah. I did. Does Emmett still have his sticker collection?"

A smile spread across my face. This kid was ingenious!

"Yeah. He does. What would you want to do with them?" I asked.

"I was thinking a certain BMW needs a makeover." Nessie smiled again.

"I love you kiddo." I winked at her. "Let's get this plan underway."

3 hours later we had a solid plan. Rosalie and Emmett were going out on a date, so that's when we were going to get the stickers from Emmett's room. He had so many it was ridiculous. He had Barbie stickers, saddle club, Harry Potter, and an extensive amount of promotional bumper stickers. We were going to have no problems completely covering the car. Then, when they had arrived home from the date, and were advancing on to 'other activities', Nessie and I would sneak into the garage, decorate her car and then sneak back upstairs and play Nessie makeover before Rosalie found out.

Then we would act innocent when we heard a very high-pitched scream and ALICE CULLEN! Being yelled.

"Come on Emmett, lets go!" I heard Rosalie yell. Two minutes later the front door slammed and we heard her car drive into the distance.

"Nessie." I whispered. "Come on. That's our cue."

Creeping like ninja spiders we crept into Rose and Emmett's and took in our surroundings. It was easy to tell whose side was whose. There was a big bed in the middle, and one side, obviously Rose's, was immaculately groomed and tidy. Emmett's however, was a mountain of mess and dirty clothing. But being me, a future telling pixie, knew exactly where the stickers were and found them in less than two minutes, then escaped with a giggling Nessie.

When we were back in the safeness of my closet we decided to start our game of Barbie Nessie. It was a new version Bella Barbie, without a reluctant model. Nessie really enjoyed her makeover games, so that's why we just ditched Bella Barbie.

Then we heard them.

"Come on honey, lets go get it on." Rosalie giggled, obviously not drunk, but high on happiness.

"Okay babe, lets do it." I gagged and was glad that Nessie's hearing wasn't as good as mine. She would have been mentally violated at their sounds. But I took that as our cue to get going.

**So? Did you like it? I'll try to update way more often but only if you review. Remember if you review, Charlie the Unicorn will come and visit youuuuuu.**


	8. Chapter 8

**I am really sorry. I haven't updated in forever and its holidays for me too. So here it is and I hope you like it. **

**Disclaimer: Twilight doesn't own me and I don't own it.**

**Chapter 8: The Sticker Plan Part 2**

We crept past Emmett and Rose's room and down the stairs into the garage.

"You got the stickers?" I whisper asked Nessie.

"Yep. You got her keys." She giggled back.

"Yep. Let's start."

We got to work pasting stickers all over her car. There were pokemon stickers on her mirrors, promotional bumper stickers all over the back and the back window. Nessie added team Jacob stickers to the inside mirror and the driver's door and I put Emmett's Playboy stickers all over his door. Other random stickers were filling in all the gaps.

I stood back and declared us finished.

"What do you think Nessie? Did we do a good job?" I asked.

"Yes." She said in a fake voice, similar to the ones on antique road show. "Quite simply marvellous."

We both giggled. "Back to our room now. We have to be away from the scene of the crime."

"Okay Alice. Let's go."

We scampered into my bedroom and started our game of Barbie Nessie.

Three and a half hours later a heard a high pitched squeal. I think it may have broken the sound barrier.

"ALICE AND RENESMEE CULLEN! WHAT IN THE WORLD OF FUCK SQUIRRELS HAVE YOU DONE!"

"That's our cue Nessie." She nodded and we walked out into the hall to face an angry Rose running towards us. I put my hands up in the air.

"What did we do Rose?" I asked innocently.

"I think the only fuck squirrels around here are you two." Nessie added mischievously.

"Bitches." Rose spat at us.

Then Esme appeared at the top of the steps with us.

"Ok what is going on here?" She crossed her arms.

"Nothing." The three of us said at the same time.

"I know that's not true. If nothing was happening, you wouldn't be calling each other 'fuck squirrels' cause that's not a nice thing to call each other. And you're teaching Nessie all this offensive language. I know she looks 15 but she is only 5." Esme was getting progressively angrier.

We all kept silent while Esme glared at us.

"Somebody," Rosalie interjected, "put Emmett's sticker collection all over my car. I don't support AFL, Barney's, kid's helpline, your mum on Facebook or safe houses."

Esme sighed. "Alice did you and Nessie put stickers on Rosalie's car."

"No Grandma." Nessie said too quickly.

"That's a yes then." She smiled. "Alice and Rosalie go to your rooms. I will deal with you later. Nessie I am going to take you to your Mum and Dad and they can deal with you accordingly."

Nessie started fake crying.

Ten minutes later Esme came in my room.

"You both have the same punishment. Your credit cards are being suspended for a month. I warned you."

Then she left leaving me miserable. I got out my iPhone and started texting Nessie.

**To Nessie: ** Hey Nessie what happened to you?  
**To Alice: ** Nothing much. They said I couldn't visit Jacob for a week.

**To Nessie:** You're lucky! My credit cards are suspended for a month. Sucks.

**To Alice:** Yeah. Sorry. TTYL

**To Nessie: **Kay Bye.

I sighed to myself. There had to be a loophole in this punishment. I was going to find it.

**It has been forever since I've updated but I still only have 8 reviews. If I don't get 12 (that's 4 more) I won't update until I do. So if you are waiting patiently for another chapter you'd better hope someone reviews. Thankyou! xx**


	9. Chapter 9

**Firstly, I'm really sorry for the long wait. My computer had a virus and it's only just gotten fixed. So I hope you enjoy this chapter. **

**Disclaimer: I just don't own twilight…**

**Chapter 9: Jack Martin**

**RPOV**

I could not believe it! That lying little bitch of a pixie! That fuck squirrel! She got me grounded! For nothing! Well, I suppose I did use "vulgar" language and I "know" that Esme doesn't like it, but that doesn't give her the right to suspend my credit cards! I really need some cheering up.

"Oh Emmy Bear!" I called to my guy.

"Yes Thumbelina." I sighed. Since Emmett had watched Thumbelina, he had started calling me that coz she came from a flower and my name was Rose. I know its twisted logic but all the same, I think Emmett was a 5 year old on steroids when he was changed.

"Stop calling me that." I whined. "I was going to show you my new "pajamas" but I can see you won't like them. You are too immature to appreciate their beauty." I sniffed and crossed my arms across my prominent chest.

"Oh! Rosie. I know I'm not too immature for that…" He waggled his eyebrows and I smiled.

**APOV**

Ew! No! That was something I just did not wanna see! I just absolutely didn't want to see Rose's next attempt to get pregnant. Stupid visions. But I really needed to know if Rose was gonna get revenge on me. I decided to take a refresher so I logged onto Facebook.

**You have 1 notification**

I clicked on the link to find that Rosalie had posted a "charming" message to me on Facebook. 'Thanks Rose', I thought to myself. I started daydreaming. Then the idea hit me! I would make a fake Facebook page for a hot guy who would keep pestering Rosalie over Facebook, IM, SMS, and a blog about his devotion to Rose. If there was one thing Rosalie hated more than girls checking out Emmett it was guys stalking her. I think that was why she didn't like Edward.

I started with the Facebook page.

**Name: **Jack Martin

**Description:** 6ft, tan, buff, blonde hair, blue eyes, dimples.

**Interests/hobby's: **Surfing, Playing football, and writing a blog. URL: .com/Reasons_I_Love_You

**Mobile:** 0495 967 536

**IM:** ThePersonILoveIsHotAndSexy (L)

I sent requests to all my (8567) friends and then logged on to Rosalie's profile. I accepted him on her profile and then put them in a relationship. I logged back out and then deleted the history.

"Just wait until tomorrow Rosalie." I thought evilly. "Just you wait…"

**(No I'm not evil enough to stop here)**

"Hmm…" I thought to myself. "How should" I do this blog. I found some pictures of her and made them the background. Then I wrote a short blog.

_Hi! This is my first post so I'm gonna tell you why I love Rosalie Hale soooooo much._

_She's hot_

_She's sexy_

_She has good sex experience._

_She's blonde_

_She added me on Facebook!_

_I love you Rosie! 333_

Then I again deleted the history and laughed.

**Did you like this? I'm sorry it's not longer and I will update again soon, but I would appreciate getting to 17 reviews (I like that number) before I update again. Xoxo MadTwilighter. (Yes I know that's gossip girl)**


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